Sunday, December 10, 2006

DIWALI

A young second generation Indian in the US was asked by his mother to
explain the significance of "Diwali" to his younger brother, this is
how he went about it...

" So, like this dude had, like, a big cool kingdom and people liked
him. But, like, his step-mom, or something, was kind of a bitch, and
she forced her husband to, like, send this cool-dude, he was Ram, to
some national forest or something... Since he was going, for like,
something like more than 10 years or so.. he decided to get his wife
and his bro along... you know...so that they could all chill out
together. But Dude, the forest was reeeeal scary shit... really man...
they had monkeys and devils and shit like that. But this dude, Ram,
kicked with darts and bows and arrows... so it was fine.

But then some bad gangsta boys, some jerk called Ravan, picks up his
babe (Sita) and lures her away to his hood. And boy, was our man, and
also his bro, Laxman, pissed..... all the gods were with him... So
anyways,you don't mess with gods. So, Ram, and his bro get an army of
monkeys.. Dude, don't ask me how they trained the damn monkeys... just
go along with me, ok... ..

so, Ram, Lax and their monkeys whip this gangsta's ass in his own
hood. Anyways, by this time, their time's up in the forest..and
anyways...it gets kinda boring,you know... no TV or malls or shit like
that. So,they decided to hitch a ride back home... and when the people
realize that our dude, his bro and the wife are back home... they
thought, well, you know, at least they deserve something nice... and
they didn't have any bars or clubs in those days... so they couldn't
take them out for a drink, so they, like, decided to smoke and
shit...and since they also had some lamps, they lit the lamps also...
so it was pretty cooool... you know with all those fireworks...
Really, they even had some local band play along with the fireworks...
and you know, what, dude, that was the very first, no kidding.., that
was the very first music-synchronized fireworks... you know, like the
4th of July stuff, but just, more cooler and stuff, you know. And, so
dude, that was how, like, this festival started."